Very very sad day, everybody knows ]:
it was really so disappointing, i can't control
myself but to cry. because i will feel better !
no worries, i'm super fine now. i think i know
what went wrong. i need a change in my life, in
order not to let myself be sad again. (:
i promise everyone, i will be good from today onwards.
thanks to all friends who accompanied.
So.. after this incident, my mind went CLEAR.
Aiai and Precious told me a lot of things, and i
reflected on myself. maybe i was really wrong.
i shoudn't judge a book by its cover, or maybe using
my senses to think all those wrong thoughts.
i should be happy to have such caring friends around.

Jasmine- thanks for everything. glad that you came when i'm feeling down. of course, i won't disappoint you. i will be really fine. i won't think too much [:
Serina- it's not entirely your fault alright. perhaps i think too much, sorry to let you worry so much. promise you that this will be the ever first and last time.
Joelynn- i don't know what happen to you, but whatever it is, you know i will not leave you alone. you can always catch up with me. this time, " i'm thinking what you're thinking ." you should know what i'm talking about. if don't know then ask me. lol. i'm not used to see the unhappy side of you. i want to see you always smiling and laughing out loud. cheers okay :D
Chris&JianU- you're not left out too. thanks for the care& concern. i hope everything is okay with you guys? thank so much. hahahaa.
Dinesh- yah, thanks for the "jokes" you made. but please, stop mentioning about that guy. we're really nothing okay. lol. wish you all the best for everything. esp .. love life? lol.

i'm going to change for the better (:

__________________________________________

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KUANWAI :D
she's always so cheerful. best wishes.
i hope your head is okay. take care. (:

PEOPLE PEOPLE! i'm so happy today. lol.
course jasmine gave me 1 GREEN pencilcase.
veryvery nice okay, and i love it so much (:
thanks so much jasmine aw jiemin. lols !
and yes, i've finish doing the blogskin for her!
yeahs. so happy. so happy. so happy. ! :DD

i survived during that 4 hours of tuition-ing.
not bad la, cause time pass very fast. lol.
after that, rushed to meet jasmine& evelyn.
evelyn rocks! she's so good in science, tutor us!
next time i got any doubts must ask her. haaha.
she left, and i waited for jasmine to finish her work.
yiling was there too, she's so cute& funny lo. lol!

aiya. nothing much for today, very boring !
course nothing to update. Urgh. @.@
no tuition tmrl. and i feel so weird lo. hahaa
i used to having tuition on sats and suns.
sighs, i will miss yeewan and yeexuan. LOLS!



believe in fate?!
-i miss those memories.-

i'm so happy. cause i finally made 1 skin. (:
and i want to shout out loud,
I LOVE MY BLOGSKIN SO MUCHIE. :DD
Everything seems to be so red && white right.
haaha. because i LOVE singapore. (:
changed my tagboard too! as well as new song!
however, the song like so laggy ! and i hate that.
i'll change it soon, when i'm really FREE! lols.

so busy with many things. Revision. Revision.
and i haven't complete my art work. damn ):
i suppose my art exam coming soon. i still got lots
to draw and research eh. sighs. No Time !
i really have no time management. Urgh ..
tuition tmrl. ! extra lesson, 4 hours ! >,<"
i hope i can concentrate well and don't fall asleep.

Chinese paper was fine. nearly had no time to finish.
course i spent too much time on my letter writing.
in the end, i had to rush in my composition.
the topics were so difficult. don't know what to write! :X
but still, i managed to squeeze some ideas out! lols.
i can't fail chinese, so i must do well in my paper 2! (:
Upcoming paper will be Humanities. very scary subject.
i fear humanities the most. i always failed history !
but i'm sure mrs ong's note would be very useful.
she's so kind to gave us the notes of the skills and everything.
I CAN DO IT ! im sure i can pass my humanities. Yes..

okay. nothing much to post. got to go.
so tired ! have a good weekend pplr. nights (:

okay. this is my pathetic 85th post. Urgh.
when will i be able to reach my 100th post !
still a long way to go. unless i post EVERYDAY.
which is like so impossible? haha. ok. whatever.

today is prettypretty Justina's birthday.
had so much fun playing with FLOUR!
however, we had to WASHUP everything.
haaa. yahui was extremely hardworking.
she kept scrubbing the floor. xin ku ni le (:
everyone was so sweet && nice looh.
thanks jasmine, for cleaning our smelly slippers!

English paper today. and it's like so oh my god.
when i read the question for composition, my whole
mind went blank. and i've got nuts to write about.
so i went on writing the letter first. but then, it's not
like other letters we usually do. it's not complain letter.
but a letter to the principal. oh my. i guess i got
everything wrong. Sobs. i'll flunk my english paper ):
COMPRE was the most terrifying. passage was so chim.
could not understand the passage at all. ! ewww..

Chinese paper 1 tomorrow.
and i sucks at chinese. i don't know why.
maybe lack of reading chinese stories, newspapers.
i sucks at english too. i'm freaking curious. lol.
in school, all the time i spoke english to my friends.
how can i fail my pathetic english ! Urgh. so angry..
i hope chinese paper will not be so difficult.!

things always turn to be like this.
i hate exam periods. because i hate the naggings.
everyday i go home, first thing my mum would asked
why have i been. why come home so late.
everyday go school laugh here laugh there like siao
char bo. go school study result like this.!
i had enough of this okay! it's like so irritating can !
everyday repeating the same old things.
you affect my mood and that's why i show u tantrum.
you should know i don't like your nagging.
i will study de laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ...

i want to make myself happy.
i must be postive.
Yes. i can overcome all the fear alone.
i can do it. Jiayou peimei (:

tomorrow will be a better day. :DD

blogging ! (: i just love blogging alright. hahaa
busy revising my work. call this last minute! lol
tomorrow is our English paper loh. so scare.
me last minute expand my vocabulary words (:
hopefully it will help. however, i'm absent minded
and always forgetting things. Urgh. how sad can
that be! so to me, last minute work some times
do not work. ewww. i hate my brain. hahaa.

now i came to realise that my chemistry sucks alot.
haaa. whatever covalent or ionic bonds.
simply cannot understand those chapters. >,<"
dumdumbdumb. it's just so dumb of me. hahaa.

lol. todae my class so funny. had 'free shows'.
they were like having 'fake fights' with one another.
and the way risshe and murali act were so funny.
then the cleaner auntie came our class, everyone
thought she would scold us for being so noisy, instead
she pretend to shout, and we all LAUGHED.
okay. i know that's very lame. but it's so funny laa.
hope my class can be so hilarious everyday. (:

wish me all the best for all my papers. heee.
dont wish me goodluck. i don't need luck.
i need effort and knowledge. hahahahahhaaa



just when can i have that feeling again.
i miss those memories. sighs...

finally settled down and revise. >,<"
hardly find me so hardworking laa. hahs.
i feel so great now, cos i finish writing down
the notes for physics. although not very neat
and colourful. but it's an effort. hahaas.

don't know why. just think that studies is impt.
for now, i only want to concentrate on my studies
and heck care about other things.
i really want to study hard now ! i hope it's not too late.
my mum everyday nags at me for revision.
and i kept delaying. i felt sorry about that laa.
so imust really score well in this mid year to prove to
her that i can do it. ! and i MUST! lols. (:

thursday is the start of english paper.
however, i turned to be afraid of that paper.
because from the recent test papers, i didn't score well.
not very confident about that paper. HOW!?
sighs. so sad. i can't afford to fail my english laa.
my chinese also very kns. then my english ! urgh.
i hope it's an easy paper. lol. impossible right., ):

STUDY. STUDY. STUDY.
concentration. (:

i can't find blogskin. so dumbdumb. ):

from the previous post, can see how sad i am.
but im pretty fine now. i dont think too much
about that incident. i'll just let it be.
be whatever it should be. hahaha.

a certain distance will do.

and YES. i'm back in blogging. haa.
being banned from using the comp again.
because mid year coming, got to study hard.

SYF result.
gold. gold. & GOLD.
all of us were disappointed. CRIES. ):
we only need that zero point something to get
Gold With Honour. whywhywhy !?
after teacher told us that, tears rolled down.
uncontrolable. sighs. just that few points.
however, we did our very best.
WELL DONE DANCERS. manymany loves (:

Dinner.
woah. nice day with dancers and teachers.
they will so great. i love them so much !
we went marina south to eat steamboat ! (:
extremely fun. haa. played in the arcade too.
so nice lah. haha. then we took a lot of photos.
EVERYWHERE ! haa. i want those photos.... xP
im sure i will miss VON and YEWEI !

Concentration is all i need for now.
no more distraction. i will put in my effort to
do well for this midyear. hehee
as for my class, everything is fine lah.
just that we lost 2 classmates. sighs.
i hope they could turn into a new leaf again.

JIAYOU. (:
i believe.

i never expected it to happen in this way.
it fears me alot, how do you expect me to face
it myself? have you thought of my feeling?
and now, so many pplr know it. how do you
expect me to face them, or maybe how they look
at me? i'm really really afraid. really really upset.
i dont know what to do now. i'm so confuse!
i had so much suffering when it comes to this.
i hate it so much. i had no one to talk to.
and im always hiding my feelings. no one actually
knows what im thinking. not even my good friends.

that's what also happen to me. freaking hell.
monday is my competition, i hope it dont affect my mood.
cos i just want to do the best for the dance.
we must get the gold of honour this year. and i must
really focus and dance well on monday.
after competiton, is our mid year examination.
i don't want to be like last year. i want to improve!
RIGHT, i shall think of the good side. i know i can do it.
i won't let this matter to affect my everything.

affirmation..

what a bad day today.
money money, everything also money.
you lost the money of cos you should be the
one responsible to pay all loh.
you think what, everytime pay money very
happy huh. you think my house print
money is it ! so stupid, left the money there
let pplr steal, now cannot find the culprit.
what class is this ! so many thieves among us.
dare steal then dare to admit lah. coward !
stupid class, shit people.
so many big mouths in my class, i know i can't
control your mouth. but at else respect can anot.
say say say. SMELLY MOUTH LAA.
i bet you also don't like pplr to say you right.
then jolly well shut your bloody mouth up.
no sense of awareness & respectful ..
@.@ so pissed off.

Yesterday.

went town w kuanyi&wai, jas&von (:
so fun laa. lol. we took a lot of photos, hahahaa
i want go heeren again. owww, so nice (:
WE WANT T BUY THAT FLIPFLOPS ! :D
new urban male top so nice so pretty :P
but super expensive, hahaha. $49.90, mygod.
gonna save money to buy that flipflops. hehee.
ilove dancers (:

Speech day was great ! i love it (:
but sad, i was really very sick that day.
sighs, so i didn't perform well. ):
my stupid health, purposely fell sick on the
impt day ! Urgh, so pissed off can !
but overall, it's veryvery fun w dancers (:
we took photos in the dance studio. haa
i shall upload some other day. heehe (:
oh yeah, the violin and piano was really great !
i can say, it's the BEST of all. nicey (:
i still like the second song most. hahaha
okae. then we went home by lorry again. lol.

Good Friday.
nah. it's not a good friday to me. lol.
because i had dance on sat, then tuition changed.
changed to friday MORNING. urgh, @.@
i'm so sick and had t go for tuition ! sobs ..
then after tuition, eat and went home !
from 1plus i slept until 7plus i wake up. lol.
i know i'm a pig. but i just want to sleep longer.
it's been so long since i had my afternoon nap.
and actually i asked my mum t wake me up at
3 to finish up my tuition work. in the end, i sleep
until so late. and i'm so lazy to do anything.
TADA! my homework still left undone. haaa.

oooo. Dance Practice today. (:
but i'm still sick. plus, i ate KFC yesterday. lol
then today keep coughing and coughing.
after dance we went Np to have our lunch at LJS.
okok. i know i didn't take care of myself.
but at least i drank a lot of water. hehehe. xP
so pplr, don't stop me from eating heaty stuffs.
i will CRY .. haaa. joking joking. (:

my sister taught me how to make cupcakes.
hahaha. she made until so nice, then mine like
so KNS ?! haa. then i added the topping.
i wanted choco icing but my sister added wrong
thing. in the end, the colour was so weird. lol
i requested for green icing, she put the flavouring
i mixed, and the colour became so GROSS ~ haaa.
i took pics of it. will upload it very soon. hhaa.

that's all for today. my post is becoming so boring.
haa. whatever.
anyway, no more song. course that web got virus.
better beware (: ANTI-VIRUS !

tuition tmr. ):

Yesterday. { happy (: }

had full dress rehearsal yesterdae. pretty great !
dancers were great too. loves (: unfortunately,
there's still pplr dropping the fans. god .!
i hope i don't make the same mistake on the actual
day itself. & i'm so excited about Speech Day (:
Uniform groups were superb. haa. that item by
npcc together with band was really nice.
i bet on Speech Day, everyone will enjoy !

Todae. { sick & sad ): }

So sick todae can ! Urgh. i'm alone todae ):
my bestie didn't come school todae. i miss her
laughter, and the way she cheer me up (:
i hope she's well now ! take good care alright.

2.4km run todae. it's the real run for NAPFA.
kind of disppointed with the timing lah.
15min20sec. if i'm 30 sec faster, i'll be able to reach
my target, 14min50sec. WHYs ?! hais, hais.
but i've already done my best. i've improved too.
anyway, no matter how i grumble, it's no use ! lol.

English compre test todae. god god ! hahaa.
luckily i managed to finish on time.
however, i don't know if i can score well. xP
i did whatever madam tang wants us to do.
those techniques that she taught, i've applied on my
paper. as for the summary, i exceeded by 8 words.
hahha. i must PASS this compre test. (:

Tomorrow { enjoyable (: }

Speech Day tomorrow. looking forward leh. lol
cross finger, nothing will happen =X haa.
all the best to Dancers (: you girls rocks <3


so curious. @.@

finally it's April. mid year round the corner.
reflection for the month of March.
it's quite an unhappy month, last year i had
encounted the same problem. { sighs }
i still remember, last year in the month of March
so many things happened. that's the worst
month of my sec2 life. it's Terrible in another word.
this year, not much problem but SAD ):
I'm pretty fine now, learning how to face the
consequences. it takes time .. (:

Vip todae was about ' Active Learners ' .
did our target setting and everything, and i agreed
very much on us being Initiative. & i seriously need
that kind of initiative to ask teachers for help !
i did my target setting, hmm. i decided to set good
targets for my english maths and combine science.
need to improve my english skill etc. ):
maths, more practices. science, revise &thinking (:

I can't wait for tomorrow's rehearsal.
don't know how will it be like ?! FUN ?! TIRING ?!
okae whatever. let's wait for tomorrow (:
i want t listen to that song played by Ts. pretty cool.
i like that song vv much, Houki Boshi. nicenice.

right, i'm going t finish off my last bit of project.
that pet rocket project sounds so interesting.
but the process of making is difficult ._.
byebyes (: nights everybody.

a smile a day, keeps the sadness away.

" yesterday is a history, tomorrow is a mystery, todae is a gift. "
i like this very much. quoted from the prize winner guy.
i really have no idea what's his name. lol. nevermind lah. (:
& it's very meaningful to me. Interesting.

i'm duper moody this few days. sorry to all my friends.
due to that, my mind went wild. i shouted, i scolded, i cried,
i angry, i sad. lost appetite. gosh, my worst days of life.
but these words came across my mind everytime i'm sad.
" Be Strong. Believe. " somehow, i've got mesmerise by those words.
i'll remember this in my mind forever. it works (:

call me a fool. scold me an idiot. blame me for my stupidity.
idon't care; it's my decision, it's my choice.
it's up to me to choose the path i want to walk.
i knew this was the wrong path for me, i'll still b walking.
because those steps i've taken, i do not want t turnback or
start afresh. what for i do things that i don't want to.
therefore, even if i'm being force. i'll still not giveup.

is everything going to be alright ?!

todae.

- rehearsal in the morning.
- went for lunch w dancers.
- went for tuition.
- home. bath. computer.
this is how slack i am todae. dam tiring. ):

shall not post anymore. gg to finish my tuition work.
sighs. byebye pplr (:


bigbig thanks to my caring friends.
i'm fine. or maybe, i will be strong like what i told myself.
hahaa. thanks again (: